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I am a technophobe.

I am one of the 7% who does not own a cellphone.

I have never sent a text message.

I don’t play video games, I don’t know the names of YouTube stars. I most certainly do not care what’s trending.

But live long enough, you might try everything once.


Remember the Twilight Zone episode A Thing About Machines? Bartlett Finchley, a guy who loathes and despises technology, gets chased down the stairs by an electric razor, chased out of the house by a TV that won’t turn off, and gets himself drowned by a car with no driver.

Well, that’s me.

My computer and I wage daily war, be it the sound shutting off for no reason, Java-based websites leaving me weird messages about me being compromised, cable cords not working, adapters not working, TV remotes blowing up, website issues, blahblahblah…

When my Columbia Millennials ask me how THE FUCK I’ve never sent a text message in my life I tell them constant communication is highly overrated.

I am obviously not a Twitter guy. Nothing about that mode of communication comes naturally to me. Sure, I have a Script Gods account that has somehow managed to accumulate a few hundred followers, but it’s not like I’m TRYING. I post exactly once a week. I do it mostly because it’s how people communicate nowadays. You run a business, you get on Twitter and tweet, and tweet, and tweet. It’s expected, and I do it. But I don’t have to like it.

All this to say that I’m surprised to announce that I’m going to be on ScriptChat this Sunday at 7pm Chicago time. My editor at Script Magazine, Jeanne Bowerman, asked me to be on and your humble narrator, the technophobe, for whatever goofy reason, said WTF, let’s do it.

ScriptChat is one of the best webcasts out there. We’ll be talking all things micro-budget, both writing and producing. If you’re about to shoot a short film, a web series, a low-budget feature–they’ll be something in those 60 minutes of discussion for you. Least I think there will be… (insert red-faced emojis).

If only for curiosity’s sake, come check out a latter-day Bartlett Finchley as he adds his voice to the cultural din of the TwitterVerse.

#scriptchat. Sunday 7pm. See ya there!

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One Response to #scriptchat
  1. Go Paul go!


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